Q "My 16 year old son is taking money out of my purse. I
know it is him but I am so frightened of what he will do to me
if I approach him. He has hit me before and is very
aggressive towards me. What should I do?"
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A Here is the National Domestic abuse Hotline # 1800 799
7233. Like it or not things have escalated out of control and
you should not be in a position where you feel threatened.
If he is doing this to you what is he doing outside the home?
He clearly has no respect for you, maybe he never has. Have
you had any other behavior problems with him and is so can
you back track and see where the problem started?
Perhaps he has emotional issues and wants to lash out at you
for what, he perceives, as a past wrongdoing. I have a
relative that did the same thing at sixteen and by nineteen
had a serious problem and was diagnosed with bi-polar
disorder. The money he stole went to drink and drugs which
only made his condition worse. I don’t know what or why your
son is doing this and I don’t have the expertise to answer, I
can only give you my opinion. You need to talk to his
pediatrician who can do some simple tests to rule out
anything serious. How about a talking to the school councilor
or his teacher to see what is going on at school.
If the pediatrician gives him a clean bill of health and it is a
behavioral issue, if you feel threatened call 911 and have him
arrested. You may not want too, but who knows what could
happen if you don’t. You are not teaching your son anything
by ignoring him or burying your head in the sand.
It is time to take back control in your own house and lay down
a few rules, do it and mean it! Tell him that you will not
tolerate his behavior and if you feel more comfortable have
his father or a friend there with you. Talk to his friends or
their parents and find out if this is going on in their homes. I
don’t want you to reward him but is there any way you could
give him an allowance in return for help around the house?
Even encourage him to get a part time job so he understands
the real value of money.
Once again, do not put yourself in a position where you feel in
danger, get the professional help you both clearly need.